Life on the ocean wave - not as easy as it looks!

There’s more to this boating malarkey than meets the eye.

You try painting a boat outdoors from stem to stern and from cabin to keel in a depressingly wet June and see how quickly you get scunnered!

And the next challenge: where to launch?

The river harbour’s gentle slipway at the Camps would seem an obvious choice but it’s often too sandy and who wants to chance getting their van bogged down at high tide? Not me.

So, it had to be Staxigoe with its fully concreted – if rather steep – slip. The more immediate issue was trying to coordinate manpower at the right time, at the right tide (with an eye on the ebb and flood waters), the right sea conditions and the right wind. Easier said than done!

A gang of willing volunteers was duly mustered and under the expert guidance of “harbour master” Michael Kuczynski the ‘Danny Boy’ was slowly roped down the ramp at high tide. It had seemed a daunting task but it all went like clockwork.

On our first trip round to the marina, we went south in the perfect sea conditions and sailed in close to the towering cliffs under the Old Man o’ Wick.

The sea tang was intoxicating. And we were almost within a hand’s grasp of the stunning cliff walls. Round a geo under the Old Wick castle we were surprised to see a young couple basking on a rocky ledge.

My brother and fellow shipmate Thomas and I instinctively decided to play a prank on them. What is it they say? Great minds think alike? Or was it more a case of ‘fools seldom differ’?

“Ver are vee?” we called out.

“Vee are lost!”

“Sprechen sie Deutsch?”

Our calls echoed across the narrow geo’s immense cliff face. The young couple seemed confused…

“Ich bin ein Auslander (I am a foreigner)”, I tried to explain.

Imagine our horror when they called back: “We are from Germany!”. I’ve never ever known Thomas to be lost for words. We meekly wished them a “nice day” and about-turned back to the marina where we thought we’d look less prattish…

I have high hopes for the coming season. It will be a short one as I’d hoped in the water by the beginning of June and not the end of the month. I certainly need to build up some more experience and plan to sail across Sinclair Bay to Keiss harbour in the north and as far as the Whaligoe steps to the south.

My nearly five-year-old grandson Jack Sinclair, although from a Helmsdale crofting background, is my first willing new recruit. This lad is fearless…

I’ve regaled him with stories of Moby Dick, and the local Orca pods that regularly pass these shores. We just need to requisition some old harpoons from the heritage centre…

‘Call me Ishmael’, as the narrator introduced Captain Ahab’s relentless pursuit of the great white whale, but this old man of the sea – yes, that’s me - is also on a mission… we have big fish to fry!

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