I DON’T take too kindly to sharp incisors plunging deep into my big toes. Especially when I’m snoozing blissfully at the kitchen fireside. But I don’t suppose the Virgin Mary was too pleased, either, to have her head chopped off.
And I can only imagine how it felt for the Baby Jesus – an infant in a manger – to be chewed to pieces as he lay, an innocent, in his tiny crib...
It was the last straw when Polar Bear’s festive bonnet suffered the ravishes of the devouring gnashers. It was then I knew I had to intervene to save the planet from Daisy.
Daisy, just to clarify, is a four-month-old Chihuahua – a wee dog with a big attitude. No-one has told her she has a size impediment. As far as Daisy is concerned she measures up, in every way, to any big canine like, say, a German shepherd.
Now Daisy, I hasten to add, is not my pooch. I’m just the sucker whose life gets periodically turned upside down when Daisy comes to visit – or stay over. Daisy’s mum is Alison, my youngest daughter, who had decided to go shopping to Inverness for the day. So I was more than happy to “baby-sit” the little fella. (Or so I thought.)
Although Daisy likes nothing better than a walk up the riverside there was no way I was venturing out.
For one thing the weather was vile but, more importantly, the red Santa coat with the furry parka hood she would usually wear at this time of year is not the sort of fashion statement I want to be associated with. I have an ailing reputation to maintain!
So for most of the morning Daisy had slept contentedly in her fleece-lined suede igloo as I read and dozed by the fire. I realise now she has a thing about feet. Old shoes, especially, are a rare treat for her and she can lie chewing old leather for hours.
Now, it seems, she also has a penchant for ornamental Nativity figures and endangered species – including my big toes!
It’s amazing what you can learn about yourself from pet animals. Even tiny not yet fully formed Chihuahuas... So when Daisy visits I’m discovering all sorts of insights about myself. Maybe I am too set in my ways... Maybe I’m not as tolerant as I thought I was. She likes her cuddles does Daisy. And being a member of the fairer sex – allegedly – like all girls “just wants to have fun”. A hyper playful Chihuahua is a sight to behold. What a crazy little dog! I think together we are learning where to draw the line, Daisy and I.
By my way of thinking she needs to learn to respect authority figures – even the graven images from a Nativity scene. And another thing: big toes are definitely a no-go area!
THERE is little sign of fun just now in the US Republican campaign to select a new presidential candidate. Mitt Romney, the frontrunner, has just scraped an eight-vote lead over his nearest rival in the Iowa caucuses. That contender, Rick Santorum, is nipping at Romney’s heels. Known for his social conservatism and uncompromising right-wing evangelical views, Santorum, according to Wikipedia the online encyclopaedia, has a “confrontational, partisan, ‘in your face’ style of politics”.
He’s the sort of politician that puts the wind up me. Think about it. He’s on the record for decrying the Supreme Court whose “nine unelected, unaccountable judges” form such a keystone in the American constitution.
That constitution, crafted by the Founding Fathers in 1787, has stood the test of time. It laid down vital checks and balances designed to prevent any potential abuse of power.
Alexis de Tocqueville, the French political thinker and historian, who wrote the defining opus Democracy in America (it appeared in two volumes in 1835 and 1840), declared “the people reign in the American political world as the Deity does in the universe”.
Indeed William Gladstone, the mid-19th century British prime minister, described that constitution as “the most wonderful work ever struck off at a given time by the brain and purpose of man”.
“We hold these truths to be self-evident,” it proclaimed, “that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their creator with certain unalienable rights, that among these are life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.”
That same constitution, as Thomas Jefferson had crafted, enshrined a “separation of Church and state” and the creation of a secular government.
It seems to me, from what I’ve read, that Bible Belt right-wing fundamentalists are a threat to democracy. They hold extreme views. Their politics are divisive and appear to alienate minority sections of society.
While they uphold a return to family values and advocate pro-life politics, some elements harbour bitter enmities towards those to whom they disapprove – whether at home or abroad.
They represent an Old Testament (and not yet mature) America which demands retribution eye-for-an-eye style.
From this side of the pond Santorum is emerging from relative obscurity but his could be a name – and a brand of politics – we might all be forced to face up to. His could be the finger (one day) on the nuke button.
Will you sleep any better tonight thinking about that prospect? Daisy wouldn’t stand a chance.
